Pleasures of the mind

14 Jul

In my vanilla life, things are going so well I can hardly believe it.  I wish I could talk about it here.  I don’t like keeping that life separate from this one.  I am the same person in both worlds; it would be sooo cool to be able to bring them together.

I picture myself bursting out of the D/s closet – wearing a red cape, with elaborately gothic black lettering:  Super Submissvive.  In my red heels, of course.  Under it, I’ll wear black stockings (maybe fishnet?) a garter belt, and a lacy bra that lifts and barely covers my breasts. 

 “Ta dum”  I’ll say, arms raised in a V.  Then I guess I’ll lower my eyes submissively…

Ok, enough of that.  It could happen, but for sure, not today.

In my blog life, really cool things have also happened.  I have been getting more hits on the blog – my current record is 31 in one day.  That just delights me.  And makes me want more.

THEN – I got 2 comments on posts.  You can’t imagine how exciting that was.  For you bloggers who have people comment on your posts ALL the time, that may not seem like a big deal.  But it is to me. 

And really, I would have been happy with that.  But the topper (so to speak) is that Sin, who has an awesome blog called “finding my submission,” added my blog to her list of blogs she likes.  That has kept me doing a little happy dance in my head for days now.    (Thqnk you, Sin!)

It also inspired me to figure out how to do an “Other people’s blog list” myself, and you can see those links over to your right.  It took me forever, so when I finally got it, it was a moment for celebration. 

So it’s not that I’m unhappy.  Or ungrateful.  Actually, I’m bubbling with pleasure,  full of joy that spills over –

– and needs to be shared – intimately.

You know.

i want to be used.  Taken. 

i want to feel His hand smack my ass.  Hard.  Hard enough to leave a handprint, warm and stinging.

i want to feel His mouth on me, hot and wet.  Pulling at my nipple.  Feel the caress between my legs, His tongue exploring.  Making me moan.

i want to feel his hand, firm and strong, wrapped in my hair.  Tugging my head back, leaving my throat exposed.  Making me whimper.

i want to hear him.  His voice, deep and commanding.  Directing.  Ordering.  Demanding.

i want to respond.  To obey.  To please.  i want to offer the caress of  my mouth, my tongue, the back of my throat. 

i want to open my legs, feel Him on top of me, His body pinning me down, feel His cock between my legs, feel Him pressing His way deep into me.  i want to feel Him pounding me, raising my hips in response, meeting each beat til He moans.

And maybe if that was all i wanted, it would be easier to find.  But, you know, i want it all.  i want Him to see me.  To know me.

i want to know Him.  His heart, His mind, His spirit and soul.  i want to hold Him in my heart, and want only the best for Him.  And i want the same for myself. 

i want blazes of passion and nights of sweet tenderness.  i want to kneel in front of Him and massage His feet,  to sit on his lap and be held, to make Him moan and make Him sigh.

i want to be pushed.  i want to have to struggle to obey, to work at taking more.

i want, i want, i want…  Sigh.

This is my call to the universe.  To Him.  Where ever He may be.    i throw my wants out there, like a prayer, and then i let them go.    

2 Responses to “Pleasures of the mind”

  1. sin July 14, 2010 at 2:32 pm #

    Hey. I’m the topper. 🙂

    Actually, I’m pretty much NEVER the topper. Giggle. I do love your writing you know.

  2. Aisha July 14, 2010 at 4:56 pm #

    Yeah, I thought it might be a novelty for you! 🙂


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