Pushing My Limits

5 Dec

i was going to pick up where i left off yesterday, with the St. Andrews cross, and taking my clothes off for impact play.  But here i am – Sunday morning – Sir is in my bed drinking coffee and reading – do i really want to do a whole long thing on flogging?  Mmmmm, not so much.

Instead, i find myself thinking about coffee.  Sir doesn’t like flavored coffee.  i do.  So i keep unflavored around for Him, coffee beans that i grind fresh each morning.  i like coffee a lot.  Yesterday, i was up much earlier than He was, made some coffee, but had just about finished it when He got up. 

So i decided to make some fresh.  i had some new coffee that i thought He’d like.  Well, it took a few minutes to get it going – you know, grinding it, and measuring, and adding water and all.  Not a real long time, right?  But a few minutes. 

The coffee was brewing nicely – maybe a fourth of the way done – when it happened.  He reached for the pot, his cup in hand.   And time stopped for me.

Sir was standing right at the edge of a firm personal limit. 

i worked in a restaurant for years in my youth.  And one lesson well learned is never “gut the pot.”  Right.  Never do what He was getting ready to do.  Stop the brewing process, fill His cup, and put the pot back.  It’s a huge taboo in restaurants because it ruins the rest of the pot.  

So, even now, like at work, when i see people getting ready to gut the pot, i say, in a firm, domly kind of voice, “Stop!  What are you doing?!!  No!  Don’t gut the pot.  It ruins the rest of the pot!”  And i tell the story about working in restaurants, and how that’s absolutely taboo, and then they don’t do it anymore.  (And yes, i can tell when it’s been done.)

Now picture me here, in my kitchen, watching Sir take his cup in hand and get ready to “gut the pot.”  i open my mouth – poised on my lips are the words:

“No!  Stop!  Don’t gut the pot!”

only they don’t quite pass my lips…  Close, but i bite them back.  

This is Sir D.  i can’t yell at Him – i don’t want to yell at Him!   He’s not some extreme Master/Dom “don’t look me in the eyes” kind of Sir, but i’m pretty sure yelling at Him isn’t my best choice.

But i can’t just stand there and watch him commit coffee sacrilege.

He looks at me, sensing my inner turmoil.  “What?”  He says. 

“Um, are you really going to – are you going to take your coffee out of the middle and then put the pot back?”  i ask, feeling that i’m being really polite and restrained.

“Yes.”  He says.  “Why?  Do you have a problem with that?”  He looks surprised – and less than pleased.  He’s still right on the verge of picking up the pot.

“Um, no Sir, well, yes, it’s just …” and talking fast, i explain about working in restaurants and how interrupting the brewing process ruins the rest of the pot. 

He looks at me as if i’m speaking in tongues.  “Are you telling Me not to do it?” He asks.

And i’m backpedaling quickly – “No, no, if that’s what You need to do, You go right ahead. It’s just, um, it’s just…”

“And I thought you made this fresh pot for me,” He says  And i stand by helplessly while He reaches out and guts the pot.  

{Laughing}  It really pushed my limits.  But i took it.  And was kind of proud of myself. 

Until last night, when we’re at the Saturday night munch.   And – i don’t even know how it comes up – i don’t think there is any context – when He says, “And what was that about this morning – when you were about to tell Me not to – what do you call it? gut the pot.  You were going to tell me not to gut the pot, weren’t you?  What’s the deal on that?”   

And it’s so strange, because right there, and even in the morning at home, there is a submissive space in my head that totally accepts that He has the right to gut the pot of coffee any time He wants to.  And, even stranger, i like that.

So i’m laughing as i answer Him, but still – i say quickly,

“But i didn’t, did i?  i didn’t tell You not to, did i, Sir?  i just, i may have expressed my feelings about it, but i certainly didn’t tell You not to do it. “

“That’s right,” He said, “You didn’t, and that’s a good thing,”  and He has His hand in my hair, and i’m blushing, and weak at the knees, and pretty sure He can gut the pot anytime He wants to. 

“You thought we were through with the coversation, didn’t you?” He says.  

i nod, well, as much as i can nod with His hand in my hair, “Yes, Sir, i did.”

“No, i was just waiting for the right time.”  He laughs, “You’re lucky i didn’t wait and bring it up in the middle of a scene, when we’re playing.”

To which i can only laugh and say, “Yes, Sir, i am lucky.” 

So my limits have been expanded, new lesson learned – “Only Sir can gut the pot.”


6 Responses to “Pushing My Limits”

  1. nilla December 5, 2010 at 12:37 pm #

    i’m not a coffee drinker, never have been…wait…i amend that. I had an extra large cup of that coffee/dessert stuff @ McDonalds on the way home from Chicago on Christmas eve eve as we began the long drive back to Mass. with our newborn infant daughter…

    and my wife said i didn’t stop talking until we were past Erie PA and heading close to Buffalo. Thats, what…um 900 miles? give or take.

    and still, i was giggling and smiling through this entire story.

    you just conquered a real personal milestone…and did it submissively! i are so freaking proud of YOU!!


    i can so see you in the kitchen mouth agape…struggling…wanting to…not wanting, too…omg…

    and then HE waits forever to bring it up. Why do they do that?

    (to learn us a good lesson)

    Coz They can.

    i’m feeling so happy for you…


    • aisha December 5, 2010 at 2:29 pm #

      Thanks, ‘Nilla –

      {Smiles} Me too.

      And I’ll remember that about you and coffee for the kinky bloggers convention. (KBC?) We’ll keep you away from the coffee!

      I’m glad I amused you!

      Hope you’re having a good one!


  2. greengirl December 5, 2010 at 9:25 pm #

    I had no idea it mattered about the coffee – we’ve been all bent out of shape because the little thingy that lets you take the pot out mid-brew without it running all over is broken and we have to wait til tht whole thing finishes to have any. Really – I knwo what you mean about pushing – it never seems to be about the things i would have expected. Sounds like it was a wonderful weekend – i’m so glad.

    • aisha December 6, 2010 at 4:31 am #

      Thanks, GG –

      It really was a wonderful weekend.

      As far as pushing – no doubt! I never expected that one!

      Sorry to hear about your coffee put thingy – I guess. {Laughing} Even though I’m convinced you’re drinking consistently better coffee now…


  3. Mick December 5, 2010 at 9:27 pm #

    this may be the ultimate test of being a good sub… minding your tongue on matters of household administration… and congratulations…. you sort pf passed.

    • aisha December 6, 2010 at 4:35 am #

      @Mick –

      Omigosh,yes! Do you do that too?

      And what do you mean I “sort of” passed! I thought I was exemplary!

      I don’t know how well I’d do if it were an every day experience though, so hats off to you. Although I imagine by now you two have established routines.

      In fairness to Sir D, I have to say, after He got through laughing His head off at my post, He said, “And I wouldn’t have minded if you made a second pot of coffee for yourself. It wouldn’t have bothered me at all.” Which amused me.


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