Need

29 Jun

i think

that just because i need

i should get.

i think 

that the longing for

should lead to having.

This is not

a law of nature.

Omigosh, aren’t youall tired of listening to me ~ wishing, wanting, fantasy after fantasy…

i’m sick of listening to me.  

No need to project that onto youall,

      ~~  youall are patient with me.  

i am sick of it.

i feel it, deep in my body, the desire is so fierce.

Physical, yes.  A lust that runs through me like a wave, threatens to turn me upside down.

Emotional too.  

An ache that starts somewhere in my chest and radiates out, electrical,

pulsating through my arms and legs, throbbing between my legs.  

The physical desire driving the level higher~~

            ~~~ and higher

                            til i think i might implode.

Just collapse in on myself.

But really, more likely, i can just continue like this, day after day, as i get older and older, til i dry up and blow away.

O, wait – no – it doesn’t have to end like that!

Um, i don’t have to end like that.

There’s Bob.

Bob and his fancy fucksall!

He can save me from that fate worse than death…

Bob?  Hey, Bob.

We need to talk…

22 Responses to “Need”

  1. ahiddenslave June 29, 2011 at 6:26 am #

    shout louder aisha…shout louder….I hear footsteps
    HSxx……

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 7:55 am #

      @HS – Ok, ok, I’ll shout louder. I hope they’re His footsteps… aisha

  2. Mick June 29, 2011 at 6:57 am #

    At least give us the product review before you blow away, AIsha.

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 7:55 am #

      @Mick – LOL. I’ll do that for sure. aisha

  3. sin June 29, 2011 at 7:36 am #

    I’m worried about that fucksall. I think we need to brainstorm other solutions.

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 7:56 am #

      @Sin,

      Bob promises me it’s perfectly safe, but you know, I’m always up for some brainstorming…

      aisha

  4. vanillamom June 29, 2011 at 8:07 am #

    what a beautiful, human post.

    i love you sweetie.

    nilla

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 8:30 pm #

      Thank you, ‘Nilla. You know i love you too! aisha

  5. thesubmissivebf June 29, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    I will never grow tired of hearing your wants, needs, wishes and dreams…like Nilla said a very human post.
    Hugs 🙂

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 8:31 pm #

      Thank you, Sbf, and hugs back to you… aisha

  6. littlemonkey June 29, 2011 at 10:52 am #

    I’m with SBF. I will never grow tired of you aisha.

    We hear ourselves in your voice. You invite us all so graciously to accompany you on your journey. How could I ever grow tired of that?

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 8:32 pm #

      Dear LM,

      Thank you. I’m glad that what I say resonates with you sometimes.

      hugs,

      aisha

  7. Bob June 29, 2011 at 10:52 am #

    Speak to me, aisha, lol

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 8:33 pm #

      Um, hi, Bob,

      {shuffles feet}

      You remember that offer you made me the other day?

      Yeah, that one.

      We need to talk dates and times, ok?

      aisha

  8. Donna June 29, 2011 at 12:30 pm #

    Do I hear a motor of some sort in the background? Getting louder? Screaming??? Oh no, my mistake, that’s Aisha getting all rev-ed up for an excellent adventure!

    • aisha June 29, 2011 at 8:39 pm #

      Dear Donna,

      LOL – that is me getting rev-ed up, kinda scary, isn’t it?

      hugs,

      aisha

      • nancy June 30, 2011 at 1:04 am #

        He he he..all rev-ed up and ready for a great adventure!
        I like that idea for you aisha.. go and have fun while you can.. bob sounds like a nice enough man~~
        And you really don’t want to disappear or blow away in the dust.. that would be hard for us to handle.
        really… it would!

      • aisha June 30, 2011 at 4:34 am #

        Thanks, Nancy – that feels like a blessing as you send me on my way!

        hugs,

        aisha

  9. greengirl June 30, 2011 at 7:41 am #

    Never tired of hearing your thoughts. Maybe try the inverse – just because you aren’t getting it (for now) doesn’t make it not a need, or not important if that word works better. You seem to have a better handle than most of us on this human perspective. I hope it is a very excellent adventure indeed.

    • aisha June 30, 2011 at 7:47 am #

      Thanks, Gg!

      But I tend to think we are all pretty amazingly insightful as we try to find our way through this marvelously mysterious life.

      hugs,

      aisha

  10. bp July 25, 2011 at 12:15 am #

    hi aisha…i’ve just found your blog, and i find you to be inspiring….not only are you an excellent wordsmith, but you seem to be very real … or perhaps i’m identifying with your writing…i’m not sure….anyway….thanks for writing

    • aisha July 25, 2011 at 4:24 am #

      @BP,

      Welcome! I”m glad you stopped by to read, and delighted that you commented.

      I am “real” of course – but I know what you mean and I’m glad that what I’m writing speaks to you. Hope to hear from you again!

      hugs,

      aisha

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