Another thing about Six X

10 Oct

i’m sure y’all are getting a little bored with my “He’s so wonderful, here’s how happy i am” posts but i can’t seem to help it.  He is and i am.

So, something else really cool about Him is that when i have a question or a concern or i just need to tell Him something, well, i don’t know if this happens to youall too, but sometimes it makes me a little anxious.  So i try to figure out the best way to approach him.

 Sometimes it makes me a little anxious just that i’m emailing Him, and i wonder if He’s going to think i’m too needy and need too much attention.  So i compose the email carefully, biting my lower lip, rereading, retyping…

until finally, i think it’s as good as it’s going to get and i take that leap of faith and hit “send” ~~

and off it goes, through the universe, landing in His in-box.

Then i wait.

The problem with an i-phone is that one can check it every two minutes, leaving one at risk of making oneself crazy… so i try not to do that.

Sometimes, it’s a while before He answers.  Like, i might email Him in the evening and not hear back til morning.  And that’s fine ~ i can tolerate that level of angst just fine.

Usually, when i send the email, i have some preconceived idea of how He might or might not respond.   You know, {laughing} if it’s a yes/no question, i think He’ll say “yes” or “no.”   If it’s a self-disclosure, i expect {i think} either some acceptance or rejection.

What He responds is usually neither.  

So when i hit the email icon on my i-phone for the 157th time, and His name is on the message at the top, my heart rate speeds up, and i hit the message to open it.  

His response immediately brings a sense of relief.  From the first line, whether it’s, “you are NOT bothering me,” or something less direct, i feel that relaxed opening of self, tension drains.  My heart relaxes.

He tends to respond in a way that’s affirming, without directly expressing approval.  Succinct, His response is somehow unexpected, and that just reflects Him.  

He has never said anything that made me feel foolish or wish i hadn’t asked.  Instead, i feel like i’m being held in His capable hands.

So i feel good about it, and about Him, and o, yes, He is all that and a damn bag of chips, and i’m wild about Him.

And very happy.

Ok, and youall already knew that.

It’s back to work today after my fun time with ‘Nilla, who i still miss.  She is so funny, and she talks just like she writes, and is interesting and easy to entertain.  When she laughs, it just fills the room.  It’s a delight to be with her.

Listening to her giggling with her Master is very sweet, and i’m so glad they’ve found each other.

i kind of think she and the wife and kids need to pack up and move closer to Where-i-Live, but it would be too hot for her here… sigh…

But there are always new things to look forward to – next week end, not this coming one, but the next one – is Kinky Kollege, so how cool is that?

18 Responses to “Another thing about Six X”

  1. thesubmissivebf October 10, 2011 at 6:14 am #

    I love that you are so happy, it gives me hope.
    🙂

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 8:56 pm #

      Thanks, Sbf, you’re right, I think it proves there’s always hope! aisha

  2. Sky October 10, 2011 at 8:37 am #

    I can relate to the anxiousness in hitting the “send” button and then the waiting. It’s a great feeling isn’t it, when our Masters don’t make u’s feel we’re bothering them etc?

    You and Sir X sound like you’re made for rach other 🙂

    Take care. Sky

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:01 pm #

      @Sky,

      Yes, it’s a wonderful feeling when they’re understanding and patient!

      You know, we actually might be…

      Thanks!!

      aisha

  3. greengirl October 10, 2011 at 8:38 am #

    Of all the qualities a Dom could have – this one is incredibly important. That he listens to you and also, that you know he is listening and respecting your feelings and questions, but that he is always leading.

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:03 pm #

      @GG,

      Yes, omigosh, you’re exactly right. It’s that combination. And yes, He’s got it…

      aisha

  4. Bill October 10, 2011 at 9:30 am #

    Sounds like you are moving along nicely in your understanding of Sir X. Hope we can get together again soon!

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

      @Bill,

      I think I am, for sure I’m trying… and yes!! I absoutely want to get together again! It was soooo wonderful meeting you and Donna! I’d love for you to meet Sir X and for him to meet you too… we’ll have to plan it.

      aisha

  5. angel October 10, 2011 at 10:00 am #

    You make my soul smile.

    xoxoxo

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:06 pm #

      @angel,

      Smiling back…. thanks, baby!

      aisha

  6. Faithful October 10, 2011 at 11:33 am #

    ~smiling & giggling~ “take that leap of faith and hit send”…
    I still do that after 1 3/4 years.

    I read and re-read again…… to make sure it all looks right… not to long, but to the point… how I sign it….what I say… if I am sending PICs- are they what I think he wants… ~laughing now~ (what is not to like right?)

    Truly I am sure none of that matters to Master at all, but it is all the psychological submission connection to him.

    At work- I just type and hit send- and am completely sure of what I am sending and saying.. but with him.. NO WAY!!

    What I have stopped doing is checking for the reply. I am not anxious anymore or need that relief of what he will or won’t say.. or even if he responds to it.

    That my friend is the security that will come in time…. and so although it doesn’t change my anxiety over sending the email- the difference is after I hit SEND .. I don’t give it another thought!!

    Glad you are doing so well~

    ~faithful

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:10 pm #

      @Faithful –

      Thank you, that’s a nice perspective, I appreciate you sharing it.

      There’s a quote by somebody about the things you spend time on being the things you love. One of my favorite authors uses that quote for a character who realizes she’s in love with someone as she does draft after draft of a letter to him, trying to hit the note she wants exactly.

      Nice to know the anxiety after SEND gets less!

      hug,

      aisha

  7. Striving for Peace October 10, 2011 at 12:30 pm #

    I am so very very happy for you — I think you pot found it’s lid.

    you’re not bothering him
    they like to be bothered
    they thrive on being bothered
    on being needed
    and wanted

    hugs sis

    sfp

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:11 pm #

      Dear Sfp,

      You know, I think you’re right!! And isn’t that just amazing??

      And speaking of pots and lids – yep… nice….

      hugs,

      aisha

  8. ahiddenslave October 10, 2011 at 5:30 pm #

    Dearest aisha, I will never get fed up of hearing how happy you are xxxxxx:)
    Hsxx

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:11 pm #

      Dear HS,

      Thank you so much – many, many hugs – someday, I’ll be reading your happiness too…

      aisha

  9. vanillamom October 10, 2011 at 8:32 pm #

    You are sweet…the best compliment ever “when she laughs it fills a room”…*smiling*…

    i’m very familiar with the “am i bothering you” heart-palpatations kind of moments …after two years i still sometimes feel that way.

    And how wonderful he is. This i know, firsthand. no…no…not in a kinky way…but as a person. He is delightful, interesting, and i hate to acribe this to anyone but really? for an outside observer?

    Perfect.

    Perfect for you.

    You have no idea how totally delighted for you i am…well, maybe you do. imagine me twirling in a circle and giggling…

    and hey, i do need to come back and visit…i forgot something.

    ….*cocks head, counts to three*…

    *giggles*

    forgot to slide down your hallway in my sox…

    mwhahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

    nilla
    ps…love you !!!

    • aisha October 10, 2011 at 9:13 pm #

      Dear ‘Nilla,

      You are so right – I don’t know how I let you leave without sliding down the hall, but the only remedy is for you to come back and do it now!! laughing…

      And you know that I love that you’ve met him, and think we’re a match {grinning} Sweet, sweet, sweet… in so many ways.

      You need to come back soon.

      aisha

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