LOL 6 – Love Our Lurkers

10 Nov

Thanks to Bonnie over at My Bottom Smarts, who started this event six years ago.  What a terrific idea – to have a time to honor all of you who read our blogs and don’t comment.

i imagine that people who read kinky blogs regularly and don’t comment often end up feeling like part of the community anyhow – at least i hope so.  i know i have readers from many different countries, and i love the idea of us being tied together by our kinky desires.

i started out as a lurker, of course.  i imagine most of us did.  But i’m not so good at keeping my opinions to myself, so it wasn’t long before i was commenting, and just a quick step to my own blog.

i know my readers come to me through all kinds of search engine terms.  “vibrating egg in pussy” is a favorite.  “spank with a spoon” “reciprocating saw dildo” “yardstick” and “i worship the cock” appear frequently.  “spanking bench” “collarme” and “clothes hanger clamps as nipple clamps” show up.   They all remind me of times gone by.

But today, i want you to know that i appreciate you.  i’m glad you read my blog.  AND i invite you to comment ~ today, or any day.

You can do it anonymously.  Or you can create a whole persona, complete with your own kinky email address.

That’s what i did – or, actually, First Sir did it for me.  At the time, i didn’t even know i could do that.  Gosh, that seems like a long time ago…  

So don’t be afraid – come on out and say Hi to us!


Yesterday, i did that thing where i get real unsure of myself and unsure of how Sir X feels about me, and i had about 5 different streams of thought bouncing off each other in my head.  

Lots of “i should have’s” and “He probably’ s.”  Enough to drive me crazy for sure.

So i just wrote them out and sent them to Him.  i told Him it was a look into the dark recesses of my mind, and it was that for sure.  

i didn’t apologize for thinking the way i was, and i didn’t apologize for sharing it with Him.  i just laid it out there.

Then i resigned myself to waiting.

And you know what?

He emailed me back quickly.  

In just a few paragraphs, He totally dispelled my anxiety.   It wasn’t ~ paternalistic or condescending.  He didn’t just say “Don’t worry,” although He did reassure me i didn’t need to be worried about the particular thing, that it was ok.  But He shared His thoughts and experience, so i could see it really was ok.

That was something to hold on to, and i read it several times throughout the day.  He really is just right for me…

26 Responses to “LOL 6 – Love Our Lurkers”

  1. Sam November 10, 2011 at 6:09 am #

    Don’t you wonder what all those lurkers are thinking? What brings them by? If they think we’re crazy, or sexy, or just don’t get the joke? I sure do.


    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:07 am #

      @Sam ~

      Yep, good point. They could be reading all tight-lipped, thinking “This is just sick! Here, let me read some more, I can’t believe how warped this is!!”

      Laughing… but I bet most of them aren’t thinking that.


  2. Sky November 10, 2011 at 6:47 am #

    I lurk on several blogs. I think it was on Hedoines blog, she mentioned that sometimes lurkers don’t comment because they feel like the “regular commenters” are all friendly, and they’re “outsiders.”

    Aisha- you reply to your commenters and welcome them. You make it easier to not be a lurker! I hope some of your lurkers introduce themselves today 🙂

    I’m sorry you were having some dark thoughts. I can relate. I’m glad your Sir reassured you. You really do seem to complement each other.

    Take care. Sky

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:13 am #


      I think you’re right – back when I was a lurker, I thought the bloggers were all friends and I couldn’t imagine belonging. It’s amazing how open and friendly they were.

      So thanks, I’m glad my blog is a receptive place for lurkers to come out – I certainly want it to be. I LOVE comments!

      As for my dark thoughts ~ yep, I can work myself up into quite a tizzy… sometimes with little or no foundation. It’s a gift. {laughing…}

      Hope things ease up for you soon.



  3. Charlene November 10, 2011 at 7:33 am #

    *waves* Thank you for writing, I look forward to reading you every day. I’m one of your lurkers – sorta….


    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:15 am #

      Hi, Charlene,

      HUGE HUGS back to you ~ and thanks for saying hi!! I think you left a comment recently, didn’t you?

      I”m always delighted to hear from new people – and then I don’t want to make too big a deal out of it cause I think it might make them uncomfortable and I don’t want my regular commenters to feel taken for granted and…

      Yeah, just silly, huh?

      Anyhow, WELCOME! I’m glad you enjoy the blog. Hope to hear more from you.


  4. heather1 November 10, 2011 at 7:40 am #

    I don’t comment often but I love reading your blog. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.


    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:17 am #

      Hi, Heather,

      I know you don’t comment often, and I love it when you do! Thanks for saying “hi” today!!



  5. Ally November 10, 2011 at 9:21 am #

    Not technically a lurker anymore but Happy LOL Day 🙂

    I am so happy for you that things are going so well.


    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:18 am #

      Thanks, Ally!

      I’m glad you’ve already come out of the lurker closet. I’ve been lurking on your blog lately, so I guess that works out, right?

      Thanks for the support.



  6. Conina November 10, 2011 at 11:50 am #

    Happy LOL day from one former lurker to another!

    So glad he responds so appropriately for you!

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:19 am #

      Hi, Conina,

      Happy LOL day back to you – I’ve enjoyed reading your comments, and your blog!



  7. Faithful November 10, 2011 at 2:20 pm #

    I like him
    I like him for you even more 🙂


    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:20 am #

      Hi, Faithful,

      Thanks! {Grinning…} Thanks a lot.

      And thanks for your “faithful” comments.


  8. Carlos November 10, 2011 at 3:39 pm #

    I came across this blog in June/July when there were a string of posts involving lipstick play – something I really enjoy. Lipstick as an element of the stories stopped all of a sudden, but by then I’d come to enjoy reading here, and still check back often.

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:21 am #

      Hi, Carlos,

      How cool! That was “The Major” series, that i never finished… I’m glad you enjoy the blog, nice to know you stop by sometimes.

      Thanks for commenting today!!


  9. Sara November 10, 2011 at 7:20 pm #

    Happy LOL Day Aisha! Sara

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:22 am #

      Hi, Sara,

      Nice to meet you! Thanks for saying hi – come back anytime, right?


  10. smilingsoul November 10, 2011 at 8:47 pm #

    I replied on your blog for the very first time just last week. I would like to thank you for your insights about yourself and your search for a Dom. Whenever a new sub asks me for reading material or links about submissives, I always refer your blog. Your search for a Dom, your honest account of your feelings while searching and your experiences with different Doms is very positive and uplifting. Also, your prospective as a therapist is especially helpful. Thank you for your positive attitude and your blog.

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:25 am #

      Dear Smilingsoul,

      Thank you so much – that’s so cool. I’m delighted that you like my blog, and immensely flattered that you refer other subs to it.

      Really. I’m almost speechless, that’s so very cool.

      I appreciated your comment last week too – feel free to chime in anytime, I love hearing from you.



  11. vanillamom November 10, 2011 at 9:11 pm #

    I am late to teh party tonight.

    i hate being last in the door! But great post, and thanks for reminding me about LOL 6…i shoulda known that was coming soon…

    we must be living parallel lives.

    i was like that Tuesday with Master. I was in a very very bad headspace, my day had sucked huge turkey balls…i was a mess.

    and i sent a few pitiful texts, then sucked it up and said what i needed to say. And i asked him if he really did like me…


    2 years and i still need reassurance at times…you are just not alone in this, heartsis.


    who is in a much better place today…TGFY (thank god for Yoga)!!

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:30 am #

      Dear ‘Nilla,

      It’s always reassuring to know that you go through this stuff too.

      And really? You weren’t sure he really liked you?

      Big Hug. You must have been having a horrible day. Real hard times can bring on that kind of angst, I think.

      Glad you’re in a better place. And if you keep touting yoga, I guess I’ll have to go try it, right?


  12. Striving for Peace November 10, 2011 at 9:45 pm #

    High highs and Low lows

    that’s part of our world

    I go back and re-read the emails when he reassures me

    and they keep me grounded.

    keeping talking to him

    he is good for you

    and I suspect — that you are good for him

    and I wonder my friend — if taking some time to review all the ways you are good for him — might not keep those dark thoughts at bay



    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:34 am #


      Yes, having those emails to review helps so much!

      And – I’m struck by your suggestion to count the ways I’m good for him. I don’t think I know what they are… hmmmm.

      Is this something I should know???

      I love that you make me think!



  13. huba November 11, 2011 at 2:39 am #

    Hi Aisha,
    I have been your lurker from Hungary for a long time.
    Reading you is my daily digest.
    happy LOL day!

    • aisha November 11, 2011 at 5:35 am #

      Hi Huba,

      From Hungary!! That is too cool! I’m delighted that you read my blog, and even more thrilled that you commented!

      Come back anytime, and feel free to speak up, right?

      Thanks – and hugs,


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