i can’t

19 Feb

i can’t post today.  Not for real.  

i want to.  But the morning is slipping away, and honestly, my heart is heavy with the latest assaults on women as people worthy of respect and care.

The vaginal ultrasound bill that may actually pass in Virginia makes me sick at my stomach, makes me want to cry.  If you haven’t heard about it, and if you want to know more, read here 

I need to go post on my vanilla blog.

“Unless one lives and loves in the trenches, it is difficult to remember that the war against dehumanization is ceaseless.”
― Audre Lorde

i’ll be back ~ maybe later today, tomorrow for sure.  Maybe i need to do some fantasies here so this becomes my place of escape again.

But right now, my heart aches, and i need to take what steps i can to push back.

14 Responses to “i can’t”

  1. Sky February 19, 2012 at 8:58 am #

    I’m sorry your heart is so heavy, Aisha.

    Please take some time for yourself today. Be good to yourself. You are such a good person with a huge heart and you care so much. Not just about others but your community and the bigger picture, too.

    Sending you hugs and hoping you feel better soon.

    Fondly, Sky

    • mouse February 19, 2012 at 12:07 pm #

      Sending big hugs and gentle thoughts. It’s so frustrating (a lot more to say too, but just can’t formulate words into anything other than a swear ridden rant).

      Hugs,
      mouse

      • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:14 pm #

        Thank you, Mouse. i know what you mean about the swear-ridden rant, believe me!!

        hugs

        aisha

    • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:13 pm #

      Thank you, Sky. I did take some time for myself today, got together with family, and feel much better.

      Thanks for the support, and the hugs.

      aisha

  2. alice February 19, 2012 at 9:37 am #

    aisha, I hadn’t heard about this before so I read the article you linked to and it makes me want to cry too. So many backward steps in the name of what?

    In the UK women are not yet feeling any curtailment of their reproductive rights, but the economic climate is forcing far more of them out of their jobs than men. Sad days indeed. It is hard today to say that we are making any progress towards equality or that the future looks good for the girls of tomorrow. But time does swing things around and every step back holds the promise of two steps forward as long as justice and compassion have a voice. Keep smiling (and blogging) Alice x

    • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:21 pm #

      @Alice,

      Thanks for the validation, it is so sad and so crazy. Makes me wish i lived somewhere else… It’s comforting to know it’s not like this everywhere.

      Interesting, the economy here is a huge problem too, of course, but i think i have read that unemployment rates for men are a little higher than they are for women ~ not a whole lot, but a percentage point or two, and of course that makes me wonder if that affects attitudes toward women…

      Sigh.

      iBut you’re right, and i keep thinking the crazier it gets, the more surely the pendulum will have to swing back. Thank you – i will keep smiling, And blogging, for sure!

      aisha

  3. Joyce February 19, 2012 at 11:55 am #

    The conservative Republicans who control the state leg in Florida tried that. Thank the good lord it got shot down by public outcry…. Hope the same prevails in Virginia. Incredible what these “good guy” politicians will try.

    Sending good thoughts your way
    Joyce

    • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:22 pm #

      Hi, Joyce,

      Thanks for reading and for commenting!!

      It is amazing, isn’t it? Interesting times we live in – who thought we’d end up here in 2012?

      Thanks for the good thoughts too, i can always use them!

      aisha

  4. greengirl February 19, 2012 at 1:23 pm #

    …and you don’t have to – you are good at knowing what you need and need to not do – and you’re smart to listen to yourself. I don’t handle my emotional self very well – mostly i try to pretend she doesn’t exist – mostly that ends up biting me in the ass. I don’t know if this will help – but – remind yourself of the constructive things you are doing, because – you are.

    • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:25 pm #

      Thank you, Gg, it’s always nice for me to hear a warm voice assuring me it’s ok to follow my own path… yes.

      And thanks for the support on what i’m doing. That means a lot to me too. It seems so small, so not-enough, but really, it’s all there is.

      aisha

  5. oatmeal girl February 19, 2012 at 1:49 pm #

    Living in Maryland, Virginia is a neighbor. Politically, they have always given me the creeps. But this… what they propose in this bill… this is rape. Pure and simple. And so outrageous that I hope it finally makes clear how far beyond excusable these so-called conservatives really are.

    It’s all about power.
    It’s radical.

    And I think even this Supreme Court would declare it unconstitutional.

    At least, I hope so…

    o.g.

    • aisha February 19, 2012 at 7:27 pm #

      I know, i totally agree, which is what i blogged today. It is rape.

      i hope you’re right about the Supreme Court. My fear is that if any of this gets up in front of them, they’ll just take out Roe v. Wade. Sigh. Better not to even think about what a mess that would be.

      Thanks for sharing some hope!

      aisha

  6. vanillamom February 19, 2012 at 10:37 pm #

    All of this weighs heavily on me…and YOU’re on the front lines for gossakes. I’m tired of explaining to my family about my passion, tired of explaining to conservative friends…I try to talk the talk gently to similarly minded people at church…and that helps, some.

    But I’m laying a bit low (you may have noted that I’ve been a bit quieter these last few days on fb since my family is not happy with my sudden interest in politics…this interest for sure. You saw, perhaps, what my wife wrote? “what uterus?” she said. As if that matters, that I don’t have one anymore? I did reply something like…”it could be Your uterus” and in person I said…”or our daughters”…that did shut her up.

    And she’s a “liberal”….it just makes me want to cry sometimes. Don’t people understand that it is so much harder to get back a right once it is taken away? Sheesh.

    Anyway…I’m glad you had time to breathe, relax. I did too. And sometimes…it helps a lot.

    Hugs, and much love,

    nilla

  7. Ashly February 20, 2012 at 2:31 am #

    Words just fail me big time. If that bill was any were else the troops would be sent in.

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