29 Mar

Last night, Sir came over.

i was a little anxious, i had been fretting a little earlier that day.  i had not been able to reach Him and i’d gotten anxious, not reasonably anxious, but out of proportion anxious. i had emailed Him, half-laughing, half-serious, and then texted a couple of times.

It was unwarranted anxiety, and i knew it at the time.  Now ~

When He gets out of the car, i notice He has his computer bag and something else in His hand.  It looks like one of His canes.

And it is.

When He gets to the door, i hug Him, wrap my arms around Him, and He hugs me back.

Then He disentangles Himself from my hug.  He puts His hand on the back of my neck, and turns me so i’m facing away from Him.

“Come on,” He says, “Let’s find a good place to do this.”

He moves me down the hallway.  “Your bedroom,” He says,  “That’s a good place.”

At the foot of the bed, His hand still on the back of my neck, He firmly presses until i bend, face down, over the bed.

He pulls my skirt up, and my panties down.

“Twenty-five,” He says.  “I think that’s a good number.  Don’t you?

i am slow to respond, so He prompts me, “Say, ‘Yes, Sir,’ that’s the right answer,” and 

i say it then, hastily, “Yes, Sir!” although i’m thinking that is a lot. Twenty-five with the cane?  Can i do that?

But we are only to Four when i feel it happen.

My shoulders relax, my back muscles let go.  i sink into the bed a little more.

i quit holding my breath, and open to the feelings.

When he finishes ~ and He has not hit me very hard, but each stroke stings a little more than the one before it, so the last one makes me gasp and whimper ~ but when he finishes, and i am standing up again, i sigh with relief and laugh a little.

He looks at me quizzically, “You’re laughing?”  And He’s smiling a little.  “Why are you laughing?”

But i can’t tell Him, i don’t know why.

“Well,” He says, “That was to help you focus.  Do you feel focused now?”

“Yes, Sir,” i say, and it’s true.  My mind is clear and i feel wonderful.

  i pause, then, “Thank you, Sir,” i say.

“Well.”  He nods.  Let’s eat dinner now.”  And we do.

14 Responses to “Focused”

  1. melinda March 29, 2012 at 6:03 am #


    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:05 am #


      It is amazing! Almost magical.



  2. melinda March 29, 2012 at 6:04 am #

    oops sorry didn’t mean to shout, didn’t notice caps lock was on :/

    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:06 am #

      Dear Melinda,

      i am getting kind of attached to your typos – no need to apologize. 🙂 i think it’s kind of endearing.

      more hugs,


  3. Mick March 29, 2012 at 6:52 am #

    so was that for annoying emails and texting, or “just because”?

    either way, you clearly deserved it.


    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:09 am #


      i don’t even know! He didn’t say, and sometimes the fewer questions one ask, the better. But i find it difficult to believe that he could have ACTUALLY found my emails and texts annoying ~ don’t you? {Grinning…}

      But yes, of course i deserved it…


  4. thesubmissivebf March 29, 2012 at 6:59 am #

    That is a wonderful relationship when he knows what you need and follows through.
    The bees knees lol

    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:10 am #

      Dear Butterfly,

      {Laughing…} The bees knees? i love that!

      Yes, absolutely, it is wonderful.



  5. Striving for Peace March 29, 2012 at 7:22 am #

    I love the matter-of-fact approach he took.

    good for you


    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:11 am #

      Dear Sfp,

      Yes. Me too. It was very calming and reassuring.



  6. vanillamom March 29, 2012 at 8:28 am #


    Absolutely just the perfect thing you needed…and wasn’t that a wonderful gift?

    I remember, in the ‘earlier” days of M and i, having that unreasoning panic if I could not reach Him. And frankly? If it is more than a few hours, I do get panic-y. He and I are pretty much able to text each other occasionally in the morning, again at noon, and a few times in the afternoon…so a long delay of 5 hours will find me looking at my phone…again and again.

    Even as recently as last month I did it, sent him a “worried” text. And got a reminder that He can’t always text me back if He is with a client. Whoops.

    And yet…even that calms me. So…i understand.

    How lovely that THEY understand, too.



    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:23 am #


      Yes, it’s funny isn’t it? How quickly that desire to connect sets in. And how easily they can calm us.

      Happy sigh…


  7. jade March 29, 2012 at 9:28 am #

    Canes are quite good for cutting through fear, no?

    Glad he was calm, sure, and focused….so you could be those things in return.

    Evidently, you did not eat dinner standing up, so it must not have been *too* hard.

    Funny, i spent all day yesterday without any focus. Is there something going around? 🙂

    • aisha March 30, 2012 at 6:29 am #


      NO doubt! He is not really a sadist, which is probably a good thing for me, right?

      As for your lack of focus, nice that we can share it, but you probably need some help with that too!!



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