Deepening Submission

29 Jul

It’s funny.  One day i’m thinking maybe He doesn’t really want a D/s relationship.  Then He says something, or does something, and i feel myself slip deeper into being submissive.  Like the gears just turned.

Sometimes, they turn a couple of notches.

Wednesday night, we were going to play ~ and we did ~ but  had to wait until the young relative who was cutting the grass got finished.  Sir thought it would be unseemly for me to be tied up naked in the basement, in case he wanted to say hi to me.

So Sir and i sat at the kitchen table and talked ~ which was its own kind of D/s play. 

He had been thinking.  He had made notes.  

Yikes.

He asked me questions.  Some of them made me blush.  He thought that was delightfully amusing, and enjoyed making it happen again.

He shared His thoughts.

He thinks i need a ball and chain.

No, seriously.

He wants to make a rope attachment to fasten it to my ankle, He likes that better than chains.  And that way, He says, He can set me down somewhere and know i’ll stay put.

He’s still designing it in His mind, but i won’t be surprised if i have something like that when we go to COPE.

Then He talks about positions.

He is thoughtful and practical.  He gently points out that neither of us are as limber and agile as we may once have been.  He wants to know what kinds of positions i think are practical and realistic.  

This conversation makes me blush some more.  And, ok, it makes me wet too.  

So i am turned on, and blushing, and maybe giggling.  But He is persistent.  

And now i have positions.  Four of them.

Later that night, He has me demonstrate them.  This is more difficult than i thought it would be ~ not physically, but with an edge of humiliation that i had not quite expected.

As you might expect, that makes me hot too.   

On Thursday, He tells me that i am to practice the positions.  He says there are four things i need to think about while i’m doing it.

And that’s when it really happens.  i thought i was moving deeper into submission all along, but this undoes me completely.  

It’s not what He says.  

Well, maybe it’s partly what He says.

His words make it clear that the point of having positions is to keep my focus on being open to Him.  Open to His gaze, His touch.

Being available to Him.  

Being pleasing to Him.  

And increasing my awareness of ways that i can be more, do more of those things.

The way He says it makes me realize that this is for real.  

And that moves me out of the realm of blushes and giggles, into the realm of throbbing hotness and ~

~ the sense of opening.  The moment of fluid receptivity that opens and fills my heart and feeds my soul.

************************

On a whole different note, big happenings in the kink world Where-i-Live.  To find out more, check out Ms. Constance’s page here.  i’ll write about it some other day.

22 Responses to “Deepening Submission”

  1. Jz July 29, 2012 at 9:30 am #

    And you can actually respond to MY post by saying you may be a smidge jealous???

    Phhhht! (I say fondly)

    Your friend, the whining ninny

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:36 am #

      Hey, Jz,

      i know ~ i’m a greedy slut, aren’t i?

      laughing…

      And i NEVER think of you as the whining ninny. Silly girl!

      yY

      aisha

  2. vanillamom July 29, 2012 at 9:50 am #

    oh. mah. gawd.

    There is hotness…and then there is HAWTNESS…

    don’t you just love/hate when They make you blush? It’s embarrassing…and a bit humiliating…and hot, too. We’re such strangely wired creatures!

    This, aisha, was stunning.
    And yup.

    I’m jealous!

    🙂

    But I love you tons and tons…Guess I’ll bring a tent next time I come visit you’all…since your cellar is purty busy these days…*giggling*…

    nilla

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:37 am #

      Thanks, ‘Nilla… 🙂

      i do love that embarrassed/blushing thing… yeah.

      As for bringing the tent… giggling… no need, we can work around you.

      hugs,

      aisha

  3. abby July 29, 2012 at 10:42 am #

    I am grinning from ear to ear for you! Isn’t it strange, we seem to deepen our submission, not in the middle of a ‘scene’, but when talking and sharing. Thanks for sharing.
    abby

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:38 am #

      Hi, Abby,

      yes. i think you’re so right. It is really the emotional stuff that feeds submission.

      Thank you for commenting!

      aisha

  4. renee rose July 29, 2012 at 11:17 am #

    Whew! That is very very hot! BTW – I’m going to be posting “spanking somatic” lessons to help people with comfort in positions, so if want, post a comment with positions that you need help with 🙂

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:40 am #

      Hi, Renee rose,

      Cool! i’ll have to check that out!

      Kneeling is a problem for me, sometimes more, sometimes less. i have knee issues. And some mild shoulder issues, so arms behind the back can be a problem if it pulls on my shoulder.

      yoga would probably help…. but i’ll take any suggestions you offer1

      aisha

  5. tammy July 29, 2012 at 2:05 pm #

    Early on in my relationship with Suzanne, i found my submission deepening during intimate physical acts. That changed, and now the deepening continues on a much more fulfilling emotional level.

    love,

    tammy

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:42 am #

      Hi, Tammy,

      Yes, i know what you mean. And i think now they feed each other – the more emotionally connected i am, the more physically submissive and vice versa.

      🙂

      aisha

  6. striving for peace July 29, 2012 at 2:08 pm #

    I am super jealous
    and
    super happy for you
    for you both

    what a difference a year makes

    sfp

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:43 am #

      Thanks, Sfp!

      Gosh, you’re so right. A year ago, i had not quite met Sir. Weird.

      hugs,

      aisha

  7. monkey July 29, 2012 at 6:20 pm #

    Yes, hotness. Lots of it. I’m happy for you.

    I have a suggestion for your Sir.(because I’m a helpful sort, giggle)

    Sir X, Instead of an actual ball and chain(rope) why not teach her to ground tie? Trail horses are trained to stand in place where ever those reins are dropped, just like they were tied down. A nice long leash on that gorgeous rope collar and train her to stay where ever you place the other end. You already have a riding crop, yes?

    :(|)

    • monkey July 29, 2012 at 6:21 pm #

      That was not a frowny face it was half of a monkey face.

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:47 am #

      Hey, Monkey,

      Thanks for the helpful suggestion. 🙂 i especially appreciated the riding crop reminder. {giggling…} Sir says, earnestly,

      “Thanks, but that won’t work. When you’re at an event with hundreds of people, like COPE, to leave her standing with a leash not attached to anything? No. Someone could pick up the end of the leash and just walk off with her. When i set her down at a table and walk away, i want to know she’s not going anywhere, people need to know she’s attached.”

      laughing… so i think there will be a ball and chain.

      aisha

  8. faithful July 29, 2012 at 6:40 pm #

    simply wonderful

    ~faithful

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:47 am #

      Thanks, Faithful! 🙂

      aisha

  9. Wordwytch July 29, 2012 at 8:13 pm #

    Lovely post. I know you have days of insecurity, but you are so loved. 🙂

    Had to giggle though over the ball and chain… why? because I thought of the same thing Moneky did!

    Then there was the other giggle…. positions. We were snuggled up last night and Wolf playfully smacked my side. Of course, my treacherous body reacts… and he laughs that laugh that tells me I’m in trouble. He does it again and gets the same reaction. So… he rolls over and preceeds to spank. He stops and says “This isn’t working. Bunny butt.” I made the mistake of saying, “What?” (Yes, we all know what comes next…) Smack! I moved up into what he meant by Bunny Butt and got the rest of my spanking. Whoa!

    Looking forward to hearing how life progresses.

    Hugs!!!

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:49 am #

      Hey, Wordwytch,

      You and Monkey on the same page, huh… i’m with you, i don’t think i need a ball and chain, but you know how these Doms are…

      And you and Wolf crack me up. 🙂

      aisha

      • Wordwytch July 31, 2012 at 10:36 pm #

        Nah, no ball and chain. 🙂 As for Wolf… He is a very strange and loving man to live with. 🙂

  10. Florida Dom July 29, 2012 at 10:01 pm #

    Love the thought of a ball and chain. That would really make you feel like you are his. And nice that you are getting new positions and are going deeper into your submission.

    FD

    • aisha July 31, 2012 at 7:50 am #

      Thanks, FD!

      Yes… {happy sigh} it will make me feel like i am His. 🙂 Thanks for commenting.

      aisha

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: