Day 23 ~ Questions ~ 30 Days of Submission

23 Sep

i missed youall yesterday ~ i overslept, missed my volunteer gig, and the rest of my day was scheduled ~ fun things, for the most part.  

i had breakfast with a friend.  Came home and ~

~ realized that my housekeeping was falling below a level that is comfortable for me.   My standards are not real high, so i had some serious tidying to do.  It felt good to get it done, although i have more to finish up today.

Then Sir and i went out for the evening, and that was fun.  We went to a fundraiser, talked to some interesting people, and then had dinner together ~ just the two of us ~ at a nice restaurant.

We came home, and i was feeling really close to Him and loving, which for me means turned on sexually too.  So, in the best of all possible endings, He spanked me soundly, fucked me, and put me to bed.

Now on to the 23rd day question.

Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?

i came late to the lifestyle, and i’ve told that story before here in different ways.  How i read Story of O when i was quite young, and was fiercely aroused by it.

And i was equally repelled by it.  i did not want to be fucked by nameless men, or whipped til i bled.  I didn’t want to wear a ring that would mark me as available to men who recognized the sing.  

Ok, those things might have been hot in the book ~ i’ll give you that.  But really, really, i didn’t want that, and i was ashamed that the idea aroused me so much.

So i disliked and questioned and didn’t act on the feelings of wanting to submit most of my life.

Seven or eight years ago, when i was almost 50, i read a book called Come Hither:  A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex.  It opened those doors for me to the possibility of the real lifestyle, and was the beginning of my sexual and submissive awakening.

As for not liking or being repelled by things about my own submission now, i can’t think of anything that strikes me that way at the moment.  

Of course there are things about other people’s dynamics that are not my cup of tea, things that i would dislike or that might repel me.  But i won’t go into that ~ it’s not my place to judge other folks’ kink.

Except ~ abuse, nonconsensual interactions, and lack of respect for each other.  Those are things that repel me.  But they’re not BDSM anyhow, so it doesn’t really count.

i have some issues with relationships that are D/s based on the idea that women are naturally s-types.  But i don’t expect everyone to agree with me.

In fact, that’s the point, isn’t it?  You can have some “ick” factor about something, and it’s ok to just keep that to yourself.  

Like i used to tell my kids when i served food they didn’t like, “It’s not actually necessary to say, “EWWWWWW, NOOOOO, YUCK, I HATE THAT!!”  A simple, ‘No, thank you, I don’t care for that,’ will do.”

7 Responses to “Day 23 ~ Questions ~ 30 Days of Submission”

  1. sin September 23, 2012 at 10:45 am #

    LOL @ “EWWWWWW, NOOOOO, YUCK, I HATE THAT!!” when a simple, ‘No, thank you, I don’t care for that,’ will do.”

    I love your blog!


    • aisha September 24, 2012 at 7:18 am #

      Thanks, Sin! 🙂

      And they got so they could say it in a really snarky tone – “I don’t care for that…”


  2. joolz September 23, 2012 at 11:04 am #

    I also avoid housework until it is necessary and then love the end result. I love the fact we are all different, and that what one person embraces as their own idea of submission is just not right for another. Loving your blog too Aisha!

    • aisha September 24, 2012 at 7:20 am #

      Thank you, joolz,

      Yep ~ it is our differences that make it so fascinating, isn’t it?

      i’m glad you’re another non- domestic type. 🙂



  3. Wordwytch September 23, 2012 at 9:58 pm #

    I have housework to do in the morning as I have family arriving on the 1st. If I take it in small bites, I’ll do better.

    Aisha, we are ‘twining’ again. 🙂 I read O and had similar reactions. I think I was 15 when I read it. Read Gor novels too. It makes me wonder when things get ‘set’ in our heads.

    As for disliking anything in my submission? No. Otherwise, I wouldn’t do it.

    • aisha September 24, 2012 at 7:22 am #

      Hey Wordwytch,

      i’m glad you can relate! We do have a lot in common, don’t we?


      • Wordwytch September 24, 2012 at 5:27 pm #

        We certainly do. There are days I read your blog and it is…. “Okay, how did she crawl in my brain and write that?” as you are saying exactly what I would.

        I like it. 🙂

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