Day 15 ~ Questions ~ 30 Days of Submission

Have you found your submission has changed with different partners/relationships? If you’re involved with partners of both sexes, does your submission relate or change based on gender or does it depend on the person?

My quick response is yes, of course my submission has changed with different partners/relationships!  Didn’t we already talk about this?

i haven’t been involved with women partners, so i can’t speak to that part of it.  O, that’s actually supposed to be the focus of the question, isn’t it?

Well, that’s ok.  

i did start wondering if my submission really changes from partner to partner, or if the context changes and my submission remains the same.  i don’t know.  The expression of my submission changes to fit what He wants, but the underlying submission is the same and just who i am.

Maybe.

Anyhow, it also occurs to me that for all the talk i’ve done from time to time about what i will or won’t do, ultimately, if Sir X wants me to do something, i’ll probably end up doing it.  i’m fortunate that He has my best interests at heart.

He disappeared for a while yesterday ~ well, i was doing other stuff, and texted Him that i was on the way home.  He texted back that He was out, would be home by 3.

Not knowing where He was, i began to wonder if He was really going to the junkyard to get that radio antenna.

Now, let me be clear.  Sir doesn’t really think i was calling Him a dumbass.  Or even implying that He’s a dumbass.  He knows i don’t think that.

And He’s not really mad at me.  

It reminds me a little bit of one of my favorite stories that Ms. Constance tells about her slave, drew.  You can read it here, it’s a fabulous drew story.  But like Ms. Constance in the story, Sir isn’t actually upset with me.

He thinks i can use the lesson in thinking before i speak, in being more attentive to what i’m saying, and to what the other person might be feeling in that moment.  And He’s right ~ i did blurt out my response without thinking.  

The radio antenna and trip to the junkyard to get it is just a fun bonus.  He says He could use my car radio antenna, but when i put it back on the car, people would wonder why it was curved in the shape of my ass.   

So you can see, He loves tormenting me with this.

Keep in mind, i know He’s not going to really hurt me.  Keep in mind, so far He’s never even left marks on my ass. So i’m not really worried about it. Not really worried, right?

When He comes home though, the first thing i ask is, “Did you go to the junkyard?”

“No,” He says, “I thought about it, I almost went, but I think you need to come with me.  Pick out your own antenna.”

Thanks, Honey.  You are too good to me.

So that is still hanging over my head, but it didn’t keep us from having fun last night.   We had dinner with Ms Constance and drew and about 12 other people to celebrate her birthday.  It was a blast, and of course she blogs about it today too.

From my perspective, let me just say that if you’re having dinner with a bunch of kinky folks, and the styrofoam container that you were going to put your left-overs in slides off the table and onto the floor under the table, you do not want to say, “Omigod, i just lost my box.”

Trust me, just don’t say it.  i’m still blushing over the reactions…

Sir tells me later that drew and Mark were busy redesigning the world down at the end of the table, which is a wee bit scary.  i enjoyed hearing about Kenny’s birds and seeing pictures of Harvard (the bird, not the school.)  And of course, Ms. Constance is always fun.  But my favorite story of the evening started with Gabe, the delightfully engaging bootblack sitting next to me.  

He was recently in a serious car wreck, and ended up in the ER with bruised ribs and lots of pain.   The nurse kept asking him to rate his pain level on a scale of one to ten, and every time she asked, the person with him laughed., thinking about Gabe’s receptivity to pain in other circumstances.  

Finally, the nurse said, “Why does he keep laughing when I ask you that?”

And Gabe explained, “Well, he’s laughing because he knows that my level of “6” might not be the same as someone else’s “6.”  I’ve ~ I’ve tested my threshold of pain quite a bit, recreationally.”  

Isn’t that a lovely way of explaining?  

So that suggested a great tag line for Ms. Constance too ~ “Testing other people’s threshold of pain, recreationally…”